The Diary of an Unhappy Nobody: Day 9

This will be a bit on the lighthearted side.

I’ve always loved naps. Any time of day. Any day of the week. My only real requirement in recent years has been that I must be in my own bed. Exceptions for travel, but I’ve never fallen asleep on a flight and I couldn’t tell you when I last fell asleep in the car.

My typical work shift ends at 7:00 pm. By about 7:40 last night I was home on the couch watching TV. By about 8:15 I felt like a sleepy puppy who couldn’t keep my eyes open. I finally gave up right around 9:00 and went to bed.

The moral of the story is that I’m an old man in a 26-year-old body. None of this has anything to do with my recent posts. I just love sleep, and clearly need it.

Also, I’m writing this just after midnight now. Pretty sure I’ll be up until dawn. Late naps turn me into a nocturnal vampire. I’m even about to eat now. 😂

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I’m an Inspirational Blogger? If you say so

very-inspring

I was nominated a little while back for the Inspirational Blogger Award by Heather. Thank you. I’ve been nominated for a million awards by a number of bloggers, but I don’t always accept because who wants to read posts with random facts about myself and no real book stuff? I don’t even want to write those kinds of posts. But I’ll accept this one because it only requires seven random facts and I won’t be nominating anyone else because my favorite blogs don’t change and I’ve already nominated several of them just a short time ago.

Seven Facts

1. I hate people who talk with their mouth full. You’re probably thinking that everyone does. No. DO NOT do it in front of me. I will yell at you to shut the hell up. Not joking at all. Annoying and disrespectful all at once. Get out of my sight.

2. I’m always hungry. From the moment I wake up until I’m falling asleep. Whenever old people tell me that their teenage son or daughter eats a lot, this is me in my head, “You have no idea what it means for someone to eat a lot. I bet I eat double what they do.” Remember, bodybuilder over here.

3. I appear to be collecting a stash of Smoothie King cups at my desk. There are six cups here. Yikes. I get a smoothie everyday after the gym.

4. I love naps. I even have a fairly specific nap schedule.

5. I have no friends. Okay, just a small few. I’m perfectly fine with that because I don’t want to hear about anyone else’s problems, anyway. I do rather enjoy talking to some people. Some.

6. I was almost kind of popular when I was in fifth grade. First, I’d finally made it into the GT class, which was where all the popular kids were. Not kidding. And second, because there was this fitness test that I can’t remember what it was called…maybe Presidential Fitness Test, it was something. There was a White badge, a Red badge, and a Blue badge. Students’ fitness was tested in gym class via a number of predetermined exercises like push-ups or pull ups. Well, in my fifth grade year I was the only person with a shot at the Blue badge. I think it had to do with your height and weight or maybe your birthday? I honestly don’t remember, but I was the only one. I’d done everything I needed to get it until I got to having to run the mile. This was the most sure thing out of everything for me, I loved running back then. I needed maybe an 8:10 or 8:30. 0r it may have been just below 8:00. BUT when my class went out to run it, I had some breathing trouble and couldn’t possibly come up with the time needed for the Blue badge. Some amount of time later, my gym teacher had me do it again before school at like 7:00 in the morning. I ran a 7:13 mile and earned myself the coveted Blue badge. But there’s more. A list was kept in the gym of the best mile times in the history of the school and I’d made the list! Something like tenth or so. I left the school before I could ever actually see my name on there, but it was great knowing I’d made it. AND somehow or another when I went to my first class that day, EVERYONE knew about my mile running. I felt like a celebrity. It was nice.

7. I’ve had six best friends in my life. I’ll even name them for you. Larry. Terrance. Leslie. Lana. Lilly. Sydney. I no longer talk to any of them. Except Sydney, who of course is in my book. So I guess that means she’s my favorite? Yeah, I’d say that. She’s also the only one I trust. And she’s funny. And holy crap she’s about to be a nurse!

No nominations this time around, so that’s all I have for you guys!